Daily Short Blog #18
It has been six months since the last time I have posted a blog. Motherhood is quite exhausting, I don’t even have time for myself for the last few months hence, no blog post.
How My Labor Started
June 1 2022, I did my usual morning routine of going to work by bus and passing by the grocery store to quickly buy some snacks, pregnancy had me always starving so I needed some snacks with me on my office drawer. By 8:30 am, I arrived at the office and around 9 am while eating my breakfast, which was Kubus (an arabic bread) dipped with Hummus, I felt that my water broke.
At first, I thought it was just my urine dripping, probably because of my already huge belly. But then, after fully urinating and emptying my bladder, a gush of water came out. That time, I knew it was my bag of water. I have finally decided to leave our office and asked my generous colleague to drop me off to the hospital where I’m expected to deliver – International Modern Hospital at Mankhool, Dubai.
I left my office around 9:30 am as I bid farewell to my colleagues because I think I will be giving birth soon hence I would go for my maternity leave. In the UAE, maternity leave is for a total of 60 days – 45 days with full pay and 15 days with half pay.
By 10 am, I have reached the hospitals’ Emergency Room (ER) and proceeded directly to the Labour Room. When I arrived, I was asked to lie down as they monitor my baby’s heartbeat, which should not go lower or higher than normal because it might mean that my baby is in distress considering I’m already losing a lot of amniotic fluid which poses a risk for infection to my baby.
Unfortunately, I didn’t proceed with having labor right away so my OB has to give prostaglandin to trigger labor and soften/ dilate my cervix. It was a small white tablet placed inside my vaginal wall. However, even after 6 hours of waiting, labor still didn’t start, so my OB has to administer the 2nd dose of this prostaglandin to finally jump start labor.
The whole experience of waiting for my labor to start was excruciating because the doctors need to check whether my cervix is dilating or not, so they have to perform multiple Internal Examinations (IE) every now and then.
At 8pm, slight labor pains started. I walked back and forth and used a birthing ball to expedite labor. Sadly, my cervical dilation and effacement didn’t progress as expected, I remained to be at just 1cm to 2cm from the time I went to the ER until 12 midnight.
The doctors kept on doing IEs and it was very painful adding up to the labor pains which I was already experiencing. At around 1am to 2am, the pain worsened that I thought I was going to die. (As I’m still writing this blog, means I’m still alive. Haha!)
I actually couldn’t imagine how I survive that night. The pain was like a thousand times more painful than dysmenorrhea. I have read from a social media group saying that having an induced labor using medications is far more painful than having a normal one without any of it.
At 3 am, I have started experiencing the worst pain in my life! I was clinging onto my husband, on my bed rails, I couldn’t get up or even use the birthing ball anymore, I just don’t know what to do with my body anymore. I was asked to go to the bathroom after an enema was administered to me – that short walk is so unimaginable. The pain is radiating to my back and to my hips.
The Pain Killer
Around 4am, it’s the time I couldn’t take the pain anymore. I have asked for pain medication to at least helped me with the pain. Since as per our knowledge, my cervical dilation is still at 3cm to 4cm. They gave me 2 options – 1st was that they could provide Morphine however it could affect the baby’s heart rate and could lead to fetal distress, while 2nd was that they could administer Epidural Anesthesia but it was very expensive, costing for AED 2,400 (or USD 654).
I have thought about it for few minutes, and when the contractions struck again, I told my husband that I couldn’t take the pain anymore and no matter how much that anesthesia was costing, I have decided to just pay for it.
The Epidural Anesthesia
After my husband paid for the drug, my OB rechecked my cervix and they’ve said that the effacement has progressed to 7cm to 8cm, therefore they couldn’t give me the epidural anymore. It has been advised that this drug could only be given while cervix is below 5cm. So yeah, the anesthesia wasn’t administered and our payment has been refunded.
The “Push”
I don’t know how to push. I just didn’t know how to!
It was my first time giving birth, I have watched YouTube videos, and yet there I was, couldn’t push properly. I knew I should push just like I was straining to poop. But I don’t know, I think I was just tired of those long hours of labor.
I was pushing for almost an hour and every time I push, the baby’s head will come near, then comes back inside whenever I stop. It was very EXHAUSTING! Plus the leg cramps because of my delivery position where they raise my legs on steel bars with cushion. That was the most tiring point of my life that I just wanted to give up.
I asked my OB that I couldn’t do it anymore, to please do a cesarean section instead, but she couldn’t. (By the way, my OB was an advocate of natural birth.) She encouraged me that I could do it, so I tried. I kept on pushing.
The Birth
So, around 4:30 am, 2nd of June 2022, I finally gave birth to my most precious healthy baby girl.
When I saw her face, every memory of that pain that I’ve experienced just vanished.
For 9 months, we have longed for her, excited to meet her. And finally, we saw her beautiful face and we were finally able to hold her.
The Episiotomy
Delivery does not end with pushing the baby outside the womb. After the baby went out, the placenta followed a few minutes after. Then the doctor has to clean the uterus making sure that there are no more blood clots left inside. Then of course, the stitches.
While pushing the baby out, I didn’t feel the cuts made by the doctor yet I could hear it. The most painful was during the stitching which took another 30 minutes or so just to finish it. I didn’t know how many stitches there were, I just knew that there were too much!
After my doctor has finished stitching, they placed ice packs on my wound to prevent further bleeding and to at least relieve some of the pain.
The Baby’s Cry
I didn’t heard my baby cry immediately which worried me a bit. Only after a few seconds she cried when a nurse cradled and covered her with a cloth. After hearing her cry, I was so relieved. And after seeing her face, I was more than happy that I couldn’t explain what I was feeling. It was both the most painful yet happiest time of my life.
The Recovery
Furthermore, I was put on a supine (or lying on my back) position for an hour or so to rest after the long labor process. I felt really exhausted yet I couldn’t sleep after all the traumatic experience I have had. I wish to see and hold my baby but I was too tired.
After 3 to 4 hours of resting inside the Delivery Room, I was then transferred to my Private Room where my husband was waiting. I arrived at the room and he was resting, my husband too was very tired and traumatized from the experience. It was quite a remarkable experience for both of us.
We were discharged after 2 days and a night thankfully with our newborn in a healthy condition.
The Takeaway
In a woman’s life, labor and delivery could be the most agonizing yet the most memorable, especially once you’ve literally pushed out the baby from your womb. It’s the most wonderful miracle above anything else I can say.
Despite the painful experience I had with my delivery, I still could praise the assistance provided to me by my endearing OB – Dr. Pranjali Singh – who has always been so comforting to me, since the day I started my consultations until the last day I was discharged from the hospital.
Dear Dr. Pranjali, if ever you passed by this blog post, I would like to whole-heartedly give thanks to you for supporting me on this very important stage of my life. I asked for the Epidural Anesthesia, but you said we don’t need it anymore; I asked for Cesarean section, but you refused because you knew that I can do it, even if I was already giving up. You are God sent – you’re like His hands pulling me up from the drowning effects of delivery.
Thank you for the Labour & Delivery nurses and other doctors – from International Modern Hospital – who took care of me and encouraged me that everything will be fine and who kept on telling me that I was brave. It has been a great help for me during that time. Though I forgot your names already, your faces and good heart will always be in my memory. 🙂
For now, I will be enjoying my life as a first-time mom who also has a full-time job. I wish I could just stay at home with my baby, but finances are always at hand – so me and my husband need to help each other in order for us to sustain living.
I thank my husband, of course, for being very patient during that time (and for all the time). I know it was so exhausting and traumatic for him as well. But he was there for me all the time, asking me for what I want and providing what I need.
It has been the most precious day of our lives.
